Female Social War: How women fight for territory and resources. Practical example of group social dynamics

Behind seven high mountains, behind seven deep rivers, there is an ancient city of one hundred towers, where many magical events happen every day. People meet there, they cooperate or fight, they look for love, they look for appreciation, happiness and their destiny. If only those streets, walls, cafés, clubs and pubs could talk! You would hear a lot of good tales, sad or joyful, so in the evening, when you will lie down in your soft bed, before going to sleep, all that fascinating scenes of eternal human search for happiness could become alive in your sweet dreams.

Women have many roles in the society today, they are not only your loving moms anymore. Although it puts them under heavy pressure, to be perfect in everything they do, to be appreciated and accepted by the society and their social vicinity, their lives are so colorful, so plentiful in emotions, feelings and endless effort to make the world a better place, that we all look up to them. They create a sustainable future for us all, where everybody will live in peace and satisfaction.

But to achieve this desired goal, many battles and wars have to be fought and won. Even a woman, a peaceful soft creature in her nature, has to assert herself in the ruthless world, full of wolves, rats and vultures, who want to take everything from you, to climb up in the social rank, using your back and your well hidden weaknesses they are able to expose and use to their advantage.

Even women fight for territory, control and resources, not only men, ruled by their aggressive Yang essence. Even women try to create their secret personal empires of power and influence, to be somebody who has general respect, and access to valuable and limited resources. This is a small scale copy of the big world, where many mighty powers, states and religions struggle for the same values endlessly, using even deadly weapons in many wars in the past, present and future, where another people inevitably suffer. That wise politicians call it always “defence”, but there is still no peace in the world, although everybody is allegedly only defending their territory. Is there anybody, who can change those sad and still valid rules of the world?

In that aforementioned city, there is a small, secret café, hidden somewhere in the labyrinth of lively streets, so only the selected few can find it. And there, you can personally and directly meet women, participating in a small social war with many clashes. Even when fighting, those females are so beautiful, and innocent in some way. They simply want to win, as everybody else. Do they go home happy then, or empty again? You should ask them next time.

Originally, it was just something as a public meeting for English conversation, so anybody could come and practice their English language, plus to consume some good refreshment, liquid or solid. But as the event continued and repeated week after week, with free entrance, something started to happen there inevitably: something as a small “internal” community was created, as some people returned more or less regularly. In addition to them, complete strangers came every week too, and thus, you could never know, who will be there, and what will happen there during a particular session.

But one thing happened always: sooner or later in the evening, a small female social war was declared. Women came there with intention to practice and improve their English, but amount of suitable partners for conversation were limited there, as majority of the visitors were of Czech, local origin, not as desirable and attractive as exotic foreigners. And of course, that communicating with a comrade from the same state and nation, even in English, has only a limited value for you. You want to acquire a good partner, and you know it’s critical for your success and happiness. Women know well, that to really improve their English there, they have to be at the right place, with the right people. But their number is limited: so they have to fight for territory.

The territory there usually means men. Quite funny! There, women literally fight for selected men. Not for their love, not for mating with them, but for their attention and time: don’t forget, it’s all about just conversation there, or it’s supposed to be. But in fact, it’s quite similar struggle like everywhere else. And it’s so interesting to watch, how different women approach to this special challenge.

Every woman is different and special, unique in the whole universe. Some of them are more direct, others indirect. Some of them are soft, some of them are not afraid to use force and coercion. But they all use some kind of personal strategy to gain control of a desirable territory: yes, to be a center of attention of a suitable man. Then, they feel well, they are flattered, they are pleased, they want to feel like small queens there, between others. They can estimate their personal value very easily, when participating in this special innocent game, which always ends, when the event is over, and the café closes, so the beautiful kind barmaid can have some deserved rest too.

There can always be just one queen, it’s the basic rule of life and any empire. And it applies to kings too. We call them Alpha Individuals, and anybody would want to be them. These people have all doors in the world opened, but to achieve this demanding goal, they have to possess a very special set of skills.

Men begin their journey for Alpha status with intimidating physical presence, showing their muscles and will to fight. But what about women? What skills can they use, to win the power?

Let me introduce you some women, who know about this issue.

“The Princess” is without any doubt the most beautiful visitor of the English classes, and she knows that well. She is a brunette in her later 20’s, couple of years after college, who wears her nice shiny dark hair in a decent pony-tail, as she probably comes to the event directly from work, so she comes dressed appropriately, as a classic, typical and self-confident professional woman, who makes a good career, who has many goals in life, and she pursues them every day. Her clothing style is decent too, she doesn’t risk too much with her outfits, keeping the decency and balance, combining mostly white and black.

She always smiles, as she knows, that a simple smile is the ultimate social weapon. She likes to study various books about personal development, as she is hungry to be a queen, and she takes the necessary preparations very seriously. Yeah, you could say, that she is responsible, that’s good… but she is also insecure, and sooner or later, her weaknesses are revealed, and she will maybe spoil her noble effort to rule the room.

But at first, everything went well. She came into the café early, with a self-confident smile on her small lips, as she saw some Czech Beta men there present already, drinking their beers silently. The Princess knows, that they are like hungry insecure dogs – if she will need to use them as tools for her goals, they are always there, ready to serve, pleased by her attention. They are weak, they are nobody, unsuitable for the mating process absolutely – but they can be useful. They are a resource which is plentiful everywhere, and that is very good news for The Princess. She knows, how to deal with them. She knows, what magic her smile can make in their conversation.

The Princess was simply ready. In perfect physical shape, relaxed, full of energy, opened, accepting, as a right woman. But still, there was a small male demon, sleeping inside her, telling her sometimes: you are not good enough, girl! You are losing! And when this Animus speaks, The Princess is scared. In that moment, she is no aspiring princess anymore: just a little, insecure girl again. But she fights to release her from this curse, to break the chains! And that day, she had another chance to prove her value to the society, and herself.

The Princess sat to the Beta table, and she relaxed. She knew very well, how to deal with her subordinates: it’s more than enough to give them a piece of bread of her temporary attention, and they will pledge eternal allegiance to her immediately. Then, they are becoming her personal assets she can count with, making her dreams about personal empire of power absolutely real and true.

No, The Princess is not bad in her nature. She just does, what has to be done. She doesn’t hurt people, in fact, she makes a good deal with Beta men. She simply exchanges her smiles and limited attention for their support, time and devotion. Later, she leaves you without giving any false promises, and that’s fair enough. It’s not her who hurts you: it’s your own weak nature, vulnerable, too depending on the favor of others.

In this moment, The Princess is on the hunt already. Like an experienced hunter, she waits silently and patiently for her prey.

But she was not an only woman there. She received a female colleague soon, a quite tall false blonde woman, The Ally, who had no aspirations for local power, so The Princess knew, that she is another good, beneficial asset, not a competition. So she gladly offered joining forces for the evening, and it paid off for both of them later. Still very good development for our dear admired Princess!

Another woman who came was a big surprise for everybody: a 17-years old female student of a high school was without any doubt the youngest person there, ever, and she knew that. This young inexperienced girl could quickly recognize with her female intuition, that she can rule there, as men will feel her natural need for protection and support, and as they are chivalrous, there will be somebody who offers her a helping, most effective hand.

The Student didn’t come there to win some absurd wars, but something inside her allowed her to recognize local opportunities. She was still a developing human being: but learning fast, feeling correctly, where to go, to be successful in the society. She simply played her role as an innocent, pure, nice and soft student, who has no bad intentions, and so she attracts only good things.

Of course, that The Princess ignored The Student absolutely. She was literally just a small fly for her, nothing like competition. Naturally, some Beta males started turning their attention to The Student instead of Princess, as the young girl played her game quite well, but that left The Princess totally cold and detached: those Beta males were still and always remaining under her spell, and only one word and a smile would be sufficient for that weak men to forget all innocent students of the world.

But The Princess was generous. She simply let The Student to participate in the party. Why not? When you help somebody, you do always a good thing.

The moment she was waiting for came soon: three men with darker olive skin and brown eyes arrived: definitely foreigners! And they looked well dressed, one of them is even very tall and handsome, as a fashion model.

And he was also bold, every woman likes that: so immediately after his arrival, he targeted The Princess without hesitation, challenged her to follow him and his companions to another table, and she gladly accepted this good offer and followed, as any woman is programmed rather to follow a man, than to lead him. She wants to be led to the stars, and if she loves you, if she feels something good and beneficial inside you, she will follow you anywhere. And that man, he was that kind obviously, so why to hesitate? It had no use to play an ice defensive and inacessible queen here: it should be still only an innocent English conversation class, after all!

As The Princess left the Beta males table to pursue her goals, Betas were not upset, rather reconciled and resigned. Local men knew her already, they met her here several times, they knew exactly, what she does. She will simply leave, sooner later, when an appropriate prey occures on her radar. What else could that losers expect? But she was honest and open: she moved there in well known patterns. So Betas were not hurt, they simply got what they deserved: loneliness in their Beta status, as any woman is equipped with perfect sensors to recognize a winner from an eternal loser.

They could keep her there, if they would have some value and abilities, but they lacked it. So how could they wonder, that she left them? Why should she lose her precious time with them, if she has her precise agenda? Girl’s life is not a charity, man!

The scholars call it “cock blocking”. Present Betas could do something to stop The Princess from leaving them, but they were losers anyway, and she is a free, independent woman, She chooses, where to go, where she will spend her time.

The Ally followed The Princess, of course, as her faithful underdog, pleased with this good opportunity. There were three guys and two women – so she could still choose, she could still be in the center of things, working in perfect coordination with The Princess to rule the room together. So, Betas remained there with The Student, at least something! To have a female and her scent close to you is always good. So for The Student, this progress was good as well. In fact, all women in the room gained advantages.

But there is always a wolf, hidden in the shadows, ready and willing to take away all treasures from you. In business, in love, in war: you are never alone. There is always a competition and challenge. All nightmares of The Princess should fulfill soon, and unexpectedly from a side she would never consider as a threat.

The Specialist, who became a doom for The Princess later, is a woman of average height and beauty, she wears glasses and modest inexpensive dress without an effort for style, she doesn’t shine too much, but she is like a hidden gem. Well equipped physically, with female shapes including significant breast tissue, she is able to gain momentum, even in comparison with The Princess easily, who is rather slim and too girlish. But The Specialist has a body of a fully mature woman, in all senses – and it is always recognized as a high quality by all men, sooner or later.

The Specialist masks her as an inconspicuous, rather Beta woman. But when she starts talking, you are quickly and fully captivated by her balance and energy. Any word she says, can destroy the covertly insecure Princess as a blade of a sword.

But The Princess was not aware of her arrival. The exotic men from distant Dubai, United Arab Emirates, sat with their backs to the wall, and The Princess, sitting against the wall, had no overview about events and development of the situation in the room. In fact, she was not in an advantageous position. She made a mistake she will regret very widely, and soon.

She followed her man too much, and advantages always count. Not her, but him, that exotic tall male model from distant and sexy Dubai in Persian Gulf, became an Alpha individual in the room, using her as his asset. Everybody could see that she is after him: she lost her momentum this way. She attached to him too much, forgetting her faithful Beta support. if she could maintain eye contact with the room, and her Beta assets, she could be a queen.

But not this way. She gave up her powers voluntarily, pursuing her prey too recklessly. She lost her support, and The Ally, sitting next to her, couldn’t change it too much. Furthermore, The Princess made another mistake, by sitting at a wrong end of the table: there remained a single empty place for another person to enter on the other side, and The Princess was too far away from this place, to counter a potential threat to her empire effectively and quickly. You have to be swift and neutralize a small forest fire, before it gains strength and grows to a firestorm, as terrorists from the Islamic State managed to do lately.

The Specialist used the same female strategy, as The Princess. There was a free chair at the Beta table, so she headed there without any hesitation. She knew, that she can build a solid foundation of her future empire there.

Both she and The Princess treated Betas without too much respect. They could fully afford it – those local men were generally quite useless for the local women, both personally and socially, here or in the outside world, no persons of a value and opportunities, related to social networking. Yes, you could expect this behaviour from The Princess, but The Specialist surprisingly went the same way, knowing her intellectual superiority. It was not just about an University education – The Specialist was far in advance, even gaining sucesses in the demanding academic world. In comparison with her, The Princess was just a cheap discotheque girl, shiny but quite worthless and common everywhere. The Specialist respected and valued herself highly – and this self-respect was shined outside, into her vicinity. Everybody could feel her healthy balance and self-confidence.

Yeah, The Specialist was a woman of many surprises and hidden qualities, some of them quite deadly for The Princess’ insecurities. Both of them were quite charming and pleasant companions, but The Specialist had something more: the highly valued ability to lead the conversation perfectly, to balance the male essence just perfectly, and it always makes all men totally fascinated and captivated.

The Specialist was simply able to combine both essences effectively, male Yang and female Yin, whereas The Princess was too confined inside her Yin nature: and that is only a half of the world. You can’t win a war for empire by controlling just half of the territory: there will a dangerous insurgency soon, like in Syria.

In the meantime, The Specialist spent some time with The Student, who was approximately ten or fifteen years younger, and a memorable moment, some kind of a female connection happened. Suddenly, they seemed so similiar in appearance. Both wearing glasses, both having a bright hair and similar voice, The Specialist treated The Student even maternally, as her beloved daughter, patiently, softly, generously, friendly, positively. She tried to give her some good advices for life, to succeed: she indicated her human care, very unique in this world.

But the reaction of The Student was surprisingly not positive, she denied any connection with the older female colleague, even in these favorable circumstances, when she could really learn something, and most importantly, to feel accepted into the mature female community. The reason was, that The Student quickly matured herself into an aspiring queen, and started to be even hostile to other women, regardless how well they treated her. She simply tasted a drug called testosterone once, and then she couldn’t stop. She switched her relation to other women as her harassing competitors, stealing the magic male essence from her, and she was not willing to allow it.

Later, it came as a nasty suprise for The Priness, when The Specialist swiftly moved to the Dubai table, using her overwhelming momentum. At first, maybe The Princess was too slow and convenient to recognize the incoming threat – but soon, it was too late. All mistakes she made previously surfaced quickly, painfully and absolutely naturally. The Specialist was able to conquer and keep the table energy for her. She sat in a very advantageous position: with her forehead directed to both opposing sides, male and female. From this highly strategic position, she could control the whole scene, and she used this perfect opportunity absolutely.

You can imagine, how deeply the energy at the table was changed immediately. But still, it was all about a male Dubai model in the center and full control, he still could decide to ignore The Specialist, publicly declaring The Princess as his counter Alpha part.

But he betrayed her, and succumbed to the spells of The Specialist. In that moment, when The Princess realized this, her soul wanted to start crying. But she was still there, she had to play her role, like nothing happened. But it was not a fight anymore, it was just keeping your face. The Princess became Beta herself – from the stars, the fall back down into common grey masses is always hard and unpleasant. If you play big game, you have to count with big losses, like Casino players know very well.

Of course, it was just a game! No one even recognized it in the room maybe, and the English language was flowing. They all came there for this purpose… but they could get yet more. At least some of them, the blessed and strong ones.

The Princess left the party quite balanced again, together with her faithful servant and companion The Ally, leaving the rich Dubai sheikh firmly in The Specialists grasps, without turning back. She lost a battle, but the war was still going on.

When she was leaving, I told her: “Hey, I will write an article about you. About the social dynamics of this group.”

The Princess was flattered. She knew, that she will play a substantial role again, and she will be a Princess agaiu, re-conquering her temporarily destroyed empire, using her faithful Beta males again, her cute useful faithful toys, always ready for service in her personal interests.

She is not a bad person – we all just have to learn again and again, to win our wars, including our dear beloved and admired women. The best approach is just to smile at this innocent game, taking nothing personally, understanding and respecting circumstances and interests of others – she is something like your younger small silly sister. She can’t hurt you with her conspicuous disdain – she only makes you smile more.

But it would be too easy to stand by the bar and smile, pretending that you don’t care. So with respect to appropriate self-criticism, I said to my male companion, after consuming two beers, when the party was still going on and we were coverly watching the Dubai table:

“Friend, if we would be real men, we would go there, and we would claim The Princess into our firm male grasp again. If you are a male warrior, you just take what you want, and no Dubai tall exotic male fashion model can stop you from entering the scene boldly and asserting your interests ruthlessly, claiming openly, that you are not afraid of confrontation with him, including a physical one. But The Princess can have only one master. It’s either you, or him. Will you let him, to leave with the juicy prey? Will you go home in peace, like nothing happened? It’s about male honor.”

“So go there, dude, be a man, be our hero! Reclaim her for the poor Betas!” the friend agreed and appealed.

“I should man, I really should, not because of her, she is not my type anyway, too slim and fragile, but just for respecting the basic male principles and values. If you are an Alpha, you permanently have to conquer and keep the territory, to be alive, to feel alive, to feel like a man. Now, I am just standing here, passively, not fighting for any achievements. I am not a man now, just a drunk loser, who fights with his mouth only, unable to execute any right action, which would show The Princess, who is the real king here.”

And with this honest self-criticism, it all ended, another chapter of this eternal party, which seems innocent, but as you can see, there are always some battles to be fought, anywhere, anytime. And what will you do? Will you remain outside, leaving all conquests and achievements to others, or will you risk, and participate?

Anyway, not all women are the same. There is one more female, who goes there: “The Technician”, who usually remains sitting at the same place, not moving to a “better place”, as The Princess does systematically. Anybody who is sitting beside her, regardless how Beta man he is, this individual is blessed – she will last with him most likely, as she proved again. In the past, she came to this evening sessions with a female friend, who is another tale, another aspiring Princess, and a very able one, but The Technician alone, she simply remains there, accepting the circumstances, without any futile effort to turn them to her favor, for example, by moving to a better companion.

When The Technician was leaving, I told her: “We locals really appreciate, that you remained with us for the whole evening. It’s simply nice of you, although we know well, that it can be quite disappointing to communicate with a Czech male neighbour for the whole evening. But you did something good for him, and for us all. We really like and appreciate you, Technician.”

She replied with a little bit sad, reconciled sigh, as she is a honest and opened person. “I was just lazy to move,” she confessed, not trying to hide, that she could use her time there better.

“Anyway, thank you, and come next time again for sure. We will make a good party!” I teased her, indicating her (falsely), that all Betas will miraculously change to something better, to rulers, kings and Alphas, to deserve general appreciation and respect next time.

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